Predictions: The 2007 Uncool List

Here are my predictions for what will become "uncool" in the area of church planting and church leadership in 2007.  These are in no particular order.

MySpace The writing is already on the wall.  With everyone from Fortune 500 companies to grandparents having a MySpace, the online "community" is going to go down as a form of marketing for churches.  Only indie bands and sixth graders will keep using the thing.

Denominations Jesus’ first miracle of turning water into wine at a wedding ceremony has taken on a new meaning thanks to denominational decisions in 2006.  According to the Southern Baptists it was irresponsible, as it could lead people to take a drink of alcohol (the root of all evil).  According to the Episcopals the wedding was that of a same-sex couple.  Denominations have become so bloated with self-importance and extreme left wing/right wing doctrinal statements that church planters will walk away from them in droves!

Mark Driscoll I like Mark and love his books.  However, his "let’s make babies so we can rock the vote" mentality…along with his big mouth will cause him to slide in the cool scale.

Cookie-Cutter Marketing "Bye-bye" Outreach Marketing, Inc. and "hello" art majors within the congregation.

Self-Help/How-To Books & Conferences
The world of church planting and lead pastors no longer needs more clones and copycats.

Pimping Shameless self-promotion of one’s book, video, church, blog, podcast, Home Shopping Network gadget or conference is getting completely uncool.  Some pimping is okay, but the key word here is shameless.

Expensive Church Technology Church planters are waking up to the fact that no one really wants to explain to God why a $3 million video wall was purchased for the sanctuary when there are single mothers in the community trying to pay bills while living in their cars.

CEO Pastors It’s called a church not a business.  The New Testament calls it "shepherding" not managing. Church planters are beginning to embrace that idea.

Brian McLaren Being controversial for the sake of being controversial just gets old after a while.  Maybe Brian’s friends at Open Door Church will continue to buy into the crap, but the rest of the world will get past it in 2007.  His 15 minutes are up.

Chris Elrod See the "big mouth" section in the Mark Driscoll listing above.

Video Venue Multi-Site Churches When a Texas church plants a video venue location in south Florida the multi-site movement has entered the "absurd" category.  Only "Boomers" and "Purpose-Driven" disciples still buy into the idea that people want to watch sermons on movie screens.  ***This "uncool item" is in no way intended to disrespect those multi-site churches that still use live people to deliver the message.

Extravagant Sunday Mornings All week strategy meetings by church staff in order to figure out how to stage a Broadway-rivaling show on Sunday will be a thing of the past.  With 20-somethings putting more importance on community, the  popularity of "the worship of worship", KISS concert-styled Sunday services will begin to slide in 2007.

Mega-Churches Large churches will always be around.  In fact we need them – and I am not saying they are wrong.  I just see a greater importance by church planters being put on shepherding the individual flock and planting new, stand-alone churches.  Because of this there will be more 500-800 member churches and more church plants being launched out of recently planted churches.

Foreign Missions Africa needs more food, more AIDS vaccines and more money.  It doesn’t need more missionaries.  Relief ministry to foreign countries will become cool in 2007 – not street crusades.

Modern Praise Music Less Chris Tomlin…more Fanny Crosby.

Dave Crowder’s Beard Great music, but his facial hair is really annoying…and uncool.  It’s like a post-modern attempt at being ZZ Top.  In 2007 someone will finally snap, hold David down and cut that crap off his chin!!

Uncool Lists Uncool lists really won’t be that cool in 2007.  Especially when they are written by a bonehead church planter in Lakeland. Florida.

Predictions: The 2007 Uncool List

8 thoughts on “Predictions: The 2007 Uncool List

  1. interesting list..tell me though..how do you think Brian McLaren is being controversial just to be controversial? It seems like this can (and historically has been) been an easy dismissal by those in power of others who are challenging the status quo..

    I hope many of your predictions are right!

    Mark Shivers

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  2. I was reading your post on Planter Planet. And I thought “sheesh, this guy is calling out Chris Elrod.” Then I looked at the author and realized you were calling yourself out. Too funny. Thanks for the list. I hope I never make it on it.

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  3. I am a missionary living in Kenya, and I just cannot remember the last time I stood in the streat preaching. I can remember the last time I feed a hungry person, bought medicines for a mother suffering with AIDS, and grieved over the death of a 9 year old boy from AIDS. In fact most missionaries I know do not preach in the street, at least that is not the only thing they do. We are already trying to provide relief. We need more missionaries not less.

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  4. Chris, I like your site, but you are completely clueless about not needing more missionaries.
    Food, vaccines & money don’t save anyone (I know you know that). You are officially invited to visit Africa (I live here and am a missionary here) and see what happens when Americans and Europeans just send food, vaccines and money. It does not fix anything. You know about suburban America. You don’t know squat about Africa.
    A good introduction to the way the rest of the world works is Robert Pelton’s book “The World’s Most Dangerous Places.” It will at least help you to get a better perspective on the way things are in the rest of the world.

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